


A Destined Love

by DianneRose2016



Category: SEAL Team (TV)
Genre: Drama, F/M, Family, Hurt/Comfort, Romance, Slow Romance, emotional angst
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-08
Updated: 2020-11-08
Packaged: 2021-03-08 22:41:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 21,946
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27454414
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DianneRose2016/pseuds/DianneRose2016
Summary: Clay and Emma have been friends for two months, but what starts off as friendship slowly turns into young love. After overhearing a conversation between the two, Jason discovers that there is more to Clay then he ever imagined. With a haunting past Clay learns what family truly means as him and Emma slowly move from friends to soulmates and all of the problems that come with.
Relationships: Emma Hayes/Clay Spenser
Comments: 6
Kudos: 31





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I wanted to do a ClayxEmma with fatherly Jason in the mix. In order for this to work though, Emma is 17 in her last year of high school and Clay is 23. Alana is still alive and this is going to be set in Season 1 before Clay joins the team. He is still in Green team, but this is after the mission that Clay was a Strap and Brian died.
> 
> I am also taking liberty with Clay's childhood as we know nothing really about it. This will be a slowburn to get Emma to the age of eighteen.
> 
> Warnings: mentions of past violence, swearing, violence and sexual content eventually.

It was Saturday afternoon when Emma and Clay walked into Emma's house. They had met in a coffee shop two months ago and ever since they had been hanging out and chatting. Clay had no idea that Emma was Jason Hayes' daughter when he met her. She was just sitting with a couple of friends trying to work on her French homework and was doing horrible with it. He had offered his help and by the end of it, he had spent four hours sitting in a coffee shop talking with Emma. They had exchanged numbers and both had been texting each other all the time. Emma knew that Clay was a Seal and was going through Green Team, but it didn't bother her. She was used to the Seal life and Clay was very different to any Seal she had ever met.

"You sure it's ok for us to be here?" Clay asked, as they walked in.

"It's fine, Mom is out with Mickey for the next few hours and Dad was still spun up. It's fine don't worry." Emma said with a smile as she went over to the kitchen to grab them some water.

"How much French homework do you have?" Clay asked, as he took the water and they went over to the dining room table to work on Emma's French homework.

"Just an assignment. It's not too bad. My Calculus assignment is a beast of confusion though. Don't suppose you know anything about Calculus?" Emma asked, putting her books on the table as they sat down.

"I do actually. Let's do your French first, that'll be the easier of the two."

Emma took out her French homework and together they got it sorted out and finished within an hour. Jason had been asleep in his bedroom, when he heard voices coming from the dining room. That normally wouldn't be an issue for him, but it was a male's voice, that didn't come from anyone in his family. He got up and headed down the hallway quietly. He was expecting it to be a boy that Emma snuck in, he was not expecting to see Clay and Emma sitting at the table working. He was about to go over there and make his presence known, when Emma speaking held him back.

"Thank-you, I swear I don't know how I would ever pass French without you."

"It's no problem, learning a new language is hard."

"Says the man that knows multiple languages." Emma said with a smile.

"I started at a very young age. You've only been taking French for a couple of years. It's different and harder to learn a new language the older you get."

"Well still, I appreciate it. Though why you would ever offer to help a high school student with their homework is beyond me."

"You and your friend were murdering a very romantic language. It hurt me down to my soul. Something had to be said." Clay said with a smile.

"That's very true. It was very bad." Emma said with a smile.

Clay looked around, he couldn't help but feel like someone was around.

"You alright?" Emma asked.

"Ya, just thought I felt someone."

"It's just us here. You haven't been getting much sleep recently, your mind is probably making you a little paranoid. I swear, my dad is not here." Emma said warmly.

"Well that's good, because he would kill me."

"He can't kill you for us being friends. It's not like we're doing anything wrong. You didn't know I was his daughter when you helped me in the coffee shop. You didn't know my last name until last month. It's not like you went and searched me out to be my friend so you can get closer to my Dad."

"He would still be pissed that we're friends. He really doesn't like me, unfortunately." Clay said sadly.

Jason wasn't really sure why it mattered to Clay if he liked him or not. Yes everyone wanted to be on Bravo, but Clay was still going through Green Team. There was no guarantee that he would even graduate from it.

"Why does that bother you so much? It's not like he's your hero or something."

"Except he is." Clay said honestly.

That surprised Jason. He knew there were guys in the Seals that looked up to him and wanted to be on his team, but none had ever called him their hero before. It made no sense to Jason, why Clay would think that. He was just another operative doing his best.

"Seriously? Why?" Emma asked, more interested in this story than he Calculus homework.

"Bit of a long story."

"Hell, the longer the better." Emma said with a warm smile.

"Really don't want to do your Calculus homework eh?" Clay said with a smirk.

"Never, ever. Come on, you might as well tell me."

Clay let out a small sigh before he spoke, surprising Jason that he would open up to Emma. "I grew up in a small town just outside Liberia and on the other side was Sierra Leone. The whole area was war torn and poverty was through the roof. My father shipped me out there to live with his parents who were aid workers, when I was four and my mother died from a heroin overdose."

"I'm sorry." Emma said sympathetically.

"It's ok, I don't remember her. My grandparents did what they could to fill that void, but they were more focused on the relief efforts than raising me. One night an attack happened in the village and they were killed. I was six and captured by the rebels. For a year and three months they kept my hands bound with rope and they had a rope leash from it to one of the other soldiers. There were about ten of us like that. We were too young to be able to hold a weapon, but they weren't going to let us go either. For those fifteen months we were starved, beaten and forced to watch as they killed and raped people. They figured if we grew to know that as normal we wouldn't put up much of an effort when we were old enough to fight. After those fifteen months they started to train us and by then we were all too afraid to do anything. I didn't even speak. They figured because I was white, I didn't know their language and I just played dumb. I was a child soldier until I was fourteen."

Both Emma and Jason could hear the pain in Clay's voice. It was clear there was still a lot of trauma from it. Jason couldn't help but feel like an asshole. He didn't like Clay the second he heard his last name and now he was learning that Clay was so much more than his name.

"I'm so sorry. I don't even know what to say." Emma said.

"Nothing to really say to that. When I was fourteen the leader had ordered me to teach this small village a lesson. He had grabbed a seven year old girl, and tied her up in the middle of the village. He had his soldiers round everyone up and his plan was for me to rape and then kill her in front of everyone. I refused and he told me if I didn't, then I would be the one tied up and he would whip me to death. As a lesson to the village and for the other soldiers that dared to go against him. I went over to the girl and I cut her loose. I picked me. My hands were tied to the post and I was whipped. I counted sixty-four of them, I was barely conscious when I heard gunfire. A Seal team that came as security for an aid relief had heard whispers of what was going on in the village. They came to make sure it wasn't happening. It got fuzzy for what felt like hours, but it couldn't have been more than a couple of minutes. Someone was talking to me, this really calm and warm voice was holding me up as my wrists were freed. He kept telling me to hold on, that it would be ok. He held me as I collapsed and he just held me in his arms while someone worked on my back. It was the first time in my life I had ever been held or hugged. The first time I felt safe."

"It was my Dad." Emma stated.

"Ya it was. He talked the whole time, just telling me anything. He wanted to make sure I stayed calm and knew I wasn't alone. At one point my heart rate dropped and I don't really remember much, but I do remember him telling me that I wasn't alone and that I needed to fight, but if I had to leave I would be going to a warm and safe place. That he was there with me and he would keep me safe. I passed out and when I woke up I was in the aid tent on one of the beds and he was gone. I found out later who he was and that he had brought me to them and didn't leave until he knew I would recover and be kept within the aid relief so I wouldn't be forced to go back."

Jason couldn't believe it. He remembered that little boy so clearly in his mind. He was thin, barely looked ten years old, he was covered in bruises and was filthy. What was the worst part, was seeing him barely conscious hanging from his wrists with his back covered in blood. He had been whipped, some going so deep he could see the kid's bone. All he could do was hold onto him and tell him he would be ok, that he wasn't alone. He had fought with his emotions that day, with Emma and Mickey already born, all he saw was his child there. It was a memory that haunted him even to this day. To know that Clay was that child and he was now well on his way of becoming a Tier One operator was amazing and impressive to Jason.

"I don't even know what to say. What happened to you was horrible. How did you end up here?" Emma asked, still trying to get her mind around this.

"After I was cleared by the doctor I decided to leave with the aid plane. I ended up in New York and I lived on the street for four years. I went to school and got my High School diploma. I would forge my father's signature when I needed it for documents and for four years I lived on the streets and stayed in shelters when I could during winter. I knew I wanted to be in the military, a Seal. I never wanted that with my father being who he is, but your dad showed me that Seals weren't what my father was. I wanted to pay what he did for me forward. I wanted to be someone that maybe he would be proud of, even if I never saw him again. When I was placed on his team as an interpreter, I thought maybe he would recognize me, but he didn't. I swore to myself that I would do everything I could to make a good impression with him. Working with Bravo was a huge opportunity to me being in their unit when I graduate Green Team. I was going to do everything I was told no matter what. But then his life was put in danger and I knew better than them that the target was planning on killing him regardless of what was said. I saved his life, but by doing so he now hates me for going against his orders. The one person I have ever wanted to make proud and I royally fucked it up. But I saved his life and that's at least one way I was able to pay him back for what he did for me."

"He doesn't hate you because you went against his orders. I overheard him and Mom talking about it. He doesn't like you because he thinks you are cocky, arrogant and unteachable. But I've known you for two months and you are none of those things, so why the persona that you are?"

"There's no hiding from you eh?" Clay said with a small smile.

"Nope, my eyes are very well trained." Emma said warmly back.

"Two years ago my father gave me this great piece of advice, at least he thought so, that you should never date a woman that you can't lie to."

"Wow." Emma said amazed.

"I know, I told you it's great advice." Clay said sarcastically.

"And that sums up your dad's viewpoint of women. Why the persona though? It's nowhere near who you are."

Clay let out a sigh before he sat back and spoke. "When I went into boot camp, it was my eighteenth birthday and I was all excited. This was the first day of the rest of my life. And the second I get off that bus I was punched right across the jaw by the lead instructor. He told me in a very nice and loud voice that anyone with blood connecting them to Ash Spenser was never going to be a soldier. Those next two months were borderline torture that they put me through. Everyone from the instructors to the students, they all wanted me to quit. Not only was I Ash's son, but I was smart. Too smart in their opinion to be a soldier. But I graduated, despite everything they did and because of my shooting capabilities I was recommended for Seal training. I took it and I started to become one of the youngest Seals in history. The next six months were intense and I was still dealing with the abuse and bullying from everyone. I stuck it out though, I was true to myself and I became a top sniper and was placed on Seal Team 3, where within a year I was number two and running the unit when our number one was unable to. But I was still getting shit and talked about for all the wrong reasons. That's when I gave them something else to talk about."

"You created a new persona of a cocky asshole."

"Pretty much. People started talking about whether I had earned the right to be cocky. They started to talk and focus on what I had accomplished in the three years that I had been a Seal. I wasn't hearing shit about my father or my IQ or that I read too much. I wasn't the smart guy that didn't belong. I was the cocky asshole that was making history. Not being liked sucks, but at least I don't have to hear shit every time I open a book. People leave me alone now instead of trying to make me quit." Clay said with a shrug.

"But why would they have such a problem with you being smart? I would think that would be a good thing."

"It's one thing to be smart, it's another to be very smart. People figured out pretty quick, before I even got out of boot camp, that I was really smart. I would read old literature books in different languages for fun. When I was first starting out, I would talk about different cultures and things I found interesting, but no one really cared about. I did it in high school and I had a few friends that did it with me. We loved learning and sharing that it was natural. But it's different when you are dealing with more street smart people than book smart. My mind loves to learn, it needs to learn, part of that is wanting to know why to everything. When superiors absolutely hate the word why. They automatically thought I was questioning their authority and their plan. When in reality I just wanted to know why they chose that plan over another so in the future when I run my own team I'll know what plan is better in a certain situation. They always assumed I was trying to go against them."

"Which makes it hard for someone that needs the stimulation. Having a need to learn like you describe is something that only happens to people with high IQ levels. So how high is your IQ really, because you have to be higher than above average."

"Swear you won't tell anyone?"

"I swear." Emma instantly said.

"177."

"Wow." Was all Emma said.

Jason shook his head. He couldn't believe that Clay had an IQ that high, no wonder he knew so many languages. His mind must have been starving from growing up in Africa. He could understand why most would think Clay was questioning their authority, but at the same time he could understand where Clay was coming from. Asking questions was how Clay learnt, how his mind absorbed as much as possible. He wasn't asking to be rude, he genuinely wanted to know their thought process so he could better understand why that specific plan was the best choice.

"Ya." Clay simply said, he was used to that reaction.

"Why be a Seal? I mean, you have a genius level IQ, you can't be stimulated enough."

"I love helping people. I love this job and being able to change someone's life. And strategy is something I love doing. I will sit and try to figure out as many plans to something that I can and I'll keep doing it until it's flawless in theory. It forces my mind to think not only strategically, but also creatively and each op is a new puzzle to work through. The only problem is I have to ask questions and I'm not allowed."

"But when you get out of Green Team, you might be in a unit that lets you ask those questions. My dad always said that being in a team is a family, you'll be able to have that support and be able to be just you and not have a persona."

"Maybe. I doubt it though. I don't know. My one instructor Adam told me that the teams are a family, but it's hard for me to believe it. I haven't had that experience and after everything I've been through I'm used to being alone. I've helped run a team, but we weren't close. I don't really know how to rely on someone else. I don't trust easily and I can get lost in my head at times. I guess I'll see what team I end up on and go from there."

"You only have a few weeks left, think you'll make it?" Emma asked with a slight smirk.

"Hell ya." Clay said with a knowing smirk.

Emma couldn't help but laugh. Clay had some cockiness in him, but she had a feeling that level of cockiness was well earned. At only twenty-three, he had accomplished a lot.

"Get your damn Calculus out." Clay said with a huge smile.

Jason didn't know what to think about any of this. Clay was not the man he thought he was. He had judged him just like everyone else. He didn't even bother to take the time to get to know him if for nothing else, but the fact that he was in Green Team and could be in his unit one day. Now he didn't know what to do or to think about him. Clay was right, he was young and had accomplished a lot. No one his age had ever made it to Green Team and he was in the running for top three, it was impressive and unheard of. He needed to figure out what to do about that and he now also had to figure out what to do about Clay being friends with Emma. What he did know was, he had to somehow make his presence known without it appearing like he was listening. Jason quietly made his way back to his bedroom and made a point of closing the door loudly. He then headed back down to the living room.

"Was that door?" Emma asked.

"I thought you said we were alone." Clay asked on edge.

"We are. There's no cars in the driveway."

Clay stood up and pulled his gun out that he had behind his back. Emma stood as well and Clay stood right in front of her with his gun in his right hand. They could hear the footsteps getting closer and when someone walked around the corner, it was the very last person either of them expected to see.

"Jesus dad, you scared the hell out of me." Emma said, as she moved from behind Clay.

Clay went and tucked his gun back into the back of his pants.

"Sorry, I didn't think I needed to let everyone know I was here in my own home." Jason said, as Emma came over to give him a hug.

"You don't, your truck wasn't in the driveway I thought you were still spun up." Emma said, hugging her dad.

"Your mom has it. Her car is in the shop. I got home just after five this morning. What are you doing here?" Jason asked Clay, doing his best to keep his voice even and calm.

"He was just helping me with my homework." Emma answered before Clay could get a chance.

"I should get going." Clay said with a nod to Jason.

"You don't need any more help with your homework?" Jason asked Emma.

"Calculus." Emma answered.

"Do you know Calculus?" Jason asked Clay as he turned to leave.

"Ya, I took it in High School." Clay said as he turned back around.

"You can stay if you want. Alana and me know nothing about complex math." Jason said with a smirk as he headed into the kitchen.

"Alright." Clay said slightly unsure.

Emma gave him a warm smile as they both went and sat down at the table again. She leaned over and whispered.

"He's plotting your murder."

Emma had a big smile on her face and Clay just shook his head.

"That's probably more accurate than you think."

Emma just smiled as she pulled out her homework assignment. They both started to go through it and Jason stood in the kitchen drinking some coffee as he listened to Clay calmly explain the parts that Emma was confused about. He didn't do the work for her, he made sure she did it. He was just there to help her understand the parts she didn't get. Jason really had no idea how he felt about Clay being friends with Emma. He knew it was different with them being just friends and Jason knew enough to know that Clay would never do anything with a minor. Still, being a Seal even as a friend would be hard for Emma if something happened to him.

It was a couple hours later when Alana walked in with Mickey. She was surprised to see someone with Emma at the table and she turned to look at Jason, who was still in the kitchen watching them like a hawk.

"Hey Mom, this is my friend Clay." Emma said.

Clay stood up and spoke as he gave a nod. "Ma'am."

"Hi, I'm Alana." Alana said with a warm smile, as she held her hand out, which Clay easily took. "It's nice to meet you."

"You as well."

"I'm Mickey." Mickey said with a big smile.

"I know, I've heard a lot about you." Clay said warmly.

"Really?" Mickey asked.

"Oh ya, how was soccer?"

"Awsome, I scored a goal." Mickey said proudly.

"Nice." Clay said, as he gave Mickey a high five.

"Do you play?"

"No, I've never actually played soccer before."

Alana moved over to the kitchen and stood next to Jason.

"What is happening?" She whispered.

"I don't know, I woke up to this." He whispered back.

"How have you never played before? Not even when you were little with your dad?" Mickey asked, surprised.

"Nope."

"How is that possible?" Mickey asked shocked.

"I grew up in Africa."

"They have soccer." Mickey pointed out.

"Not in the area I lived in."

"Oh, do you play hockey?"

"Nope, can't skate."

"You don't know how to skate?" Emma asked.

"There's no ice in Africa Emma." Mickey stated, like it was the most obvious thing.

"Ya Emma." Clay added with a smirk.

"There's no pools either, but you know how to swim." Emma said back.

"How did you learn how to swim if there were no pools?" Mickey asked.

"I learned after I came back to the States."

"Wait, how old were you?" Emma asked with a big smile.

"None of your business." Clay said back.

"It was basic training wasn't it?" Emma said with a playful smile.

"How old is not the point. I am very good at it." Clay said and they all had the answer.

"It's not that uncommon. There were three guys in my basic training that couldn't swim." Jason said, trying to free Clay.

"Ya, but you're really old." Mickey pointed out.

"Thanks." Jason said, not impressed.

"You went through basic training?" Mickey asked, turning back to Clay.

"I did."

"Did you just finish?"

"Nope, it was five years ago."

"Wait, you're twenty-three? You look like you're nineteen. Are you in the Navy?"

"A Seal ya."

"Really? You don't look like a Seal, aren't Seals supposed to have more muscles?" Mickey asked, not being rude, but genuinely wanting to know.

"Uncle Brock isn't that big." Emma pointed out.

"No, but he has Cerb, he doesn't need the muscles. Do you have a dog too?" Mickey asked.

"I don't."

"Well, what do you do then?"

"I'm a sniper and a linguistic specialist."

"What's that?"

"It means I'm really good with languages and interpreting different dialects and meaning behind the way someone says something. I also double as a culture specialist for most of the Middle East and parts of Asia. I speak nine languages, six of them fluently."

"Wow. You definitely need more muscles." Mickey said.

"I'll keep that in mind." Clay said and Jason could tell Clay was at his limit for insults from a child.

"Mickey, go wash up. I'm gonna get dinner going here." Alana said, beating Jason to the punch.

"But I have more questions." Mickey whined.

"You can ask Clay the next time he's over here." Jason said.

"Ok, think about what I said about the muscles. And next time I could always teach you how to play soccer."

"I will think about it and for sure." Clay said with a warm smile.

Mickey ran off to get cleaned up, and Clay turned to the others.

"I'm gonna go."

"Are you sure? You can stay for dinner." Jason said.

"I appreciate the offer, but I should get going." Clay said, not wanting to push his welcome or risk getting on Jason's bad side.

"Thanks for the help." Emma said with a warm smile.

"No problem. I'll talk to you later Emmy."

"See ya Clay." Emma said with a big smile.

"Have a good night Sir, Ma'am." Clay said with a nod to both Jason and Alana.

"Good night Clay, drive safe." Alana said.

Clay headed out and both parents turned to look at Emma.

"What the hell was that?" Jason asked, keeping his voice calm. The very last thing he wanted was to push Emma and Clay together by him not approving.

"That was a friend helping me with my homework." Emma said.

"Oh really? So all of your friends call you Emmy?" Jason challenged.

"Clay does, so what?"

"How long have you known him?" Alana asked.

"Two months. We met at a coffee shop, me and Beck were working on our French homework and Clay overheard us. He came over to just point out one thing and then he ended up staying and helping us for four hours. We exchanged numbers and we've been talking ever since. We're just friends and he had no idea that my last name was Hayes until last month. There's no ulterior motive here that you can go after him for." Emma said as she crossed her arms.

"I didn't say there was. I was just surprised that you knew each other. Being friends with Clay won't be easy though. He's twenty-three and chances are he's going to graduate from Green Team. He'll be a Tier One Operator, that comes with a lot, as you know." Jason said.

"I know, but that shouldn't stop me from being his friend. You might not like him, but he's a good man and has been nothing but a gentleman with me. He knows how old I am and he has a girlfriend. We're just friends."

"We're not saying there is anything wrong with you being friends Sweetie." Alana said.

"And I never said I didn't like him. I was just surprised." Jason added.

"Maybe you should tell him that." Emma said, before she headed off for her room.

Jason let out a long sigh, and Alana knew he wasn't too happy about this situation.

"We can't stop them from being friends, you know that." Alana said.

"I'm not worried about them being friends. If something happens to Clay over there, it will be hard, but she'll survive that. I'm worried about what could happen after she turns eighteen."

"He's got a girlfriend, so it's not like he's going to break up with her once Emma turns eighteen. We don't even know if they have feelings for each other like that. Clay could easily see her as nothing more than a friend, the same for her."

"Naw, you didn't see the way they were talking or looking at each other. They were joking around and then talking about some deep shit. Shit you don't talk about with just some friend. He might have a girlfriend, but I doubt she will be the one. Now I gotta figure out what the hell to do about it."

"There's nothing you can do. She's going to be an adult soon. We don't have the right to tell her who she can and can't date, especially when he's a good person. Clay wasn't going to be on Bravo though anyways right?"

"I don't know now." Jason said, sounding troubled.

"What is it? Something is bothering you more than them just being friends."

Jason let out a sigh and he looked down the hallway to make sure they were still alone. He turned to face Alana as he spoke. "Do you remember my mission to Africa nine years ago?"

"The one where you saved a young boy, the one that was whipped. What about it?"

"That kid is Clay." Jason said, showing a pain to his voice still at the memories that haunted him.

"What? How?" Alana asked, shocked.

"I overheard him telling Em about it. He was a child soldier from six until fourteen. He was whipped because he refused to rape and kill a seven year old girl. He left when he was healed enough and got a ride with the aid plane. He spent the next four years homeless in New York while going to high school. Then at eighteen he enlisted right away and went through some pretty hard shit that I had no idea. He was bullied and abused by the instructors and the student through basic and Buds because of his last name. He created a cocky persona just to have people leave him alone. He has to be someone else, just so he doesn't have to deal with being bullied. Do you know how ridiculous that is? He's around grown ass adults and he has to pretend to be someone he's not just so he doesn't get bullied by them."

Jason shook his head. All of it was unfair and he had no idea how he was ever going to fix things. Even if he did pick Clay it would still be complicated with him being friends with Emma and potentially them dating later on. All he did know was that he needed to start to fix things. Clay was a good man and he had been through some horrific trauma in his life. He could have given up when he was fourteen, but he fought to overcome being a child soldier and now he is fighting for his country. He deserved better than the way he had been treating him.

"He got out of that life and now he has grown into being a good man that is fighting to make this world better. He shouldn't have to hide who he is. What are you going to do?" Alana knew that Jason wasn't going to just let this go. He was going to be doing something.

"I don't know yet, but something. I'm going to make sure he knows that I don't hate him, that he doesn't have to hide who he is around me. He called me his hero. He became a Seal because of me. Said the first time he had even been hugged was when I was holding him. I can't even imagine. At fourteen he had never even been hugged. Can you imagine seeing Em and Mickey everyday and not hugging them? He had his grandparents until he was six and they never hugged him."

"I can't imagine it, but unfortunately it happens. I'd imagine he doesn't trust very easily either."

"Probably not. It's going to take some work, but we'll get there. I had to leave him behind once, I'm not doing that again."

Alana went over and kissed his cheek and gave him a warm smile before she started with dinner. Jason had no idea what was going to happen in the future, but he was going to try and get more information on Clay tomorrow out of the two people who might know him.

Jason walked into the team lounge to see if he could find Blackburn or Adam. He wanted to talk to them about Clay and see what they knew. He couldn't get the image of a fourteen year old Clay hanging by his wrists covered in blood out of his mind. He couldn't stop wondering what Clay's back looked like, how it healed, if it was still causing him problems. He knew he should be talking to Clay and letting him know that he now knows it was him all those years ago, but Jason wasn't sure he was ready for it yet. He needed to know more, he needed to get some opinions from people who knew Ash and could maybe shed some light. Jason found both Blackburn and Adam in the team lounge, each with a cup of coffee in their hands. They both gave Jason a friendly smile as he walked in.

"Hey Jason, how are ya?" Adam asked.

Jason closed the door, a sign to everyone in the building that you were to stay out. With that simple action, both Adam and Blackburn were put on edge.

"What's going on?" Blackburn asked.

"Nothing that you are thinking. I just don't want anyone to overhear this conversation." Jason said, as he walked over to them.

"Everything ok with the wife and kids?" Adam asked.

"Ya no they're fine. You both were on the same team as Ash, I was hoping you could tell me more about the kid. He anything like his old man?"

"Oh I don't think there will ever be anyone like Ash." Blackburn said with a shake of his head.

"Some people were not meant to be parents. Before Clay was born, the three of us were all close, Alpha One, Two and Three. There wasn't anything that we thought would break us apart, ruin our friendship." Adam started.

"We knew Ash liked to sleep with prostitutes, we never said anything. Figured there was no harm in it. Figured he was wearing protection to ensure he wouldn't have a child. He made it very clear from early days that he had no interest in kids. He didn't like kids, even the ones we would come across on tour or on an op. Whole team knew that you didn't leave Ash watching any child. When he told us that a prostitute was pregnant with his child, we almost had a heart attack." Blackburn continued.

"Did you know she was a heroin user?" Jason asked.

"Not until after the kid was born. He tried to get her to have an abortion, but she refused. He even bribed her with money, but she didn't want it. Or she did want it, but she knew she could get more after the kid was born. He wasn't involved with the pregnancy, didn't care that she was still using off and on. It was a miracle that Clay wasn't born addicted to anything. His biological mom, Ericka, was in and out of his life during those four years before she died of an overdose." Blackburn answered.

"After they were released from the hospital we both went over to Ash's place to see the kid. Ericka was gone on a binder and it was just him and Clay. Clay was two days old when we first saw him. Clay was crying, he had him laying on the floor, the hardwood floor, in nothing but a diaper and Ash was screaming at him to shut up while drinking a beer. There were pieces for a crib all over the floor, it looked like it had been smashed with a hammer. I went right over to Clay and picked him up and got him sorted out." Adam said.

"I got Ash sorted out. I told him to go sleep it off that we would watch over Clay. He hadn't even named him yet. When we asked what his name was, he just said it didn't matter, that he didn't need one. To him Clay was worthless and something that was going to interrupt his career and goals to make millions. We gave him his name that night and we promised him that he would always have his two uncles looking out for him." Blackburn said.

"Thankfully Kate and Vic were very understanding women and loved children. We both went from being two newly married couples to raising a baby together. It was also the end of the Three Musketeers and it destroyed Alpha team. Ash wouldn't pay for anything for Clay. If he ran out of formula, he didn't care he would let Clay scream until he passed out. Clay's mother would come back and forth between binges. She showed up when Clay was two months old and Ash refused to stay around or help. He was going on ops with Alpha and even with other teams just so he wouldn't have to be around either of them. He resented Clay for having to be home with him for those first two months." Adam continued.

"We thought maybe his mother would be better, that being around Clay would make her want to stay sober. That lasted four months before she took off again for six weeks. We were on an op when she left. We came back and Clay had been left alone for two days just laying in his crib. After that we made sure that only one of us were gone on an op at a time. We would rotate and when we went on tour Kate and Vic would rotate with Clay."

Jason shook his head. He couldn't imagine not being there for his children, especially when they were that young. To leave an infant on their own like it was nothing, it was disgusting.

"What was he like as a kid?" Jason asked.

"Ash and me were best friends, he made me and Vic godparents to Clay. We fell in love with him the moment we saw him. We all started to figure out Clay was different around two. When he was eighteen months old he started to grab any book that he could get his hands on and he would go and hide in his closet." Adam started to explain.

"In his closet?" Jason asked, confused.

"He used to drag his blanket in there with him and he would spend hours hiding in his closet with a pile of books." Blackburn said with a nod.

"At first we figured it was just a little boy being a little boy. But then when he was two he would sit in front of the TV and he only wanted to watch shows in French or Spanish. And the shows he did like to watch were documentaries. At three I came home from tour and I went straight to his room at our place and he was in his closet with a chapter book for a third grader. I got him out and we curled up on the couch with it and I asked if he wanted me to read some to him. He looked at me and just said he could read to me. I thought he would make up some story, but he didn't. We spent three hours as he read it to me, word for word. At three years old he was already at a grade three reading level and he could speak a bit of Spanish and French from the shows he was watching." Adam continued.

"I know he has a high IQ, it's up there in the one-seventies." Jason said, not surprised at all that Clay was a child prodigy.

"Wow, I didn't know it was that high." Adam said, shocked.

"When Adam told us about Clay reading the book we all agreed he needed to be tested. We tried to get Ash to do it for him, but he didn't have any interest in it. We all tried to teach Clay what we could and he loved everything you would teach him. It was the only time you ever really saw him happy and smiling. He wouldn't often engage with people, he was shy and introverted. Once we learnt that he was special we started to see that the little things he did could be attached to his IQ." Blackburn explained.

"He wasn't social. Unless it was me or Vic, he wasn't the kid that went to you when you walked through the door. He wasn't one for hugs, he seemed confused by them. We had tried our best when he was younger, but not having that consistent comfort from one parent made it difficult for him to get used to being hugged and cared for. We tried to get him socialized. We would take him to parks and libraries to interact with kids his own age, but he wouldn't play with them. The only time we ever really saw him smile or act his age was when we were teaching him something."

"And it didn't matter what you taught him. He loved to learn no matter what it was." Blackburn added.

"When we found out that Ericka died when he was four, it had already been a week. We went to Ash's to make sure Clay was ok, but he was gone. Ash told us he shipped him off to live with his parents in Washington. I was pissed. Vic and me had been talking about adopting Clay, going through the courts and take him away from the abuse and neglect. There had been a couple of times we all suspected that Ash was physically abusing him in those last six months. Bruising that we couldn't explain away, the way he drew more into himself. That was the end for us and for Alpha." Adam said sadly.

"We didn't even know he was in the military until Green Team. We haven't figured out how to brooch the subject of Adam being his godfather or that we knew him when he was younger." Blackburn finished.

"So you don't know what happened to him after he was four?" Jason asked, he was feeling a heavy rock in the pit of his stomach. There was a good chance they had no idea what Clay had been through.

"No we don't." Blackburn answered.

"Emma and Clay have been friends for a couple of months now. They met in a coffee shop and he overheard her murdering the French language and he helped her and her friends with their homework. Ever since they've been hanging out and texting apparently. I just found out about it last night. Clay had no idea that Emma was my daughter until last month."

"How do you feel about that?" Adam asked. He knew that Jason wasn't a real big fan of Clay, so having him around Emma might not be his idea of a good thing.

"Undecided. I'm not worried about Clay and her doing anything, at least not until she is eighteen. I know he would never do anything with her being a minor." Jason started.

"I thought they were friends?" Blackburn asked.

"They are, but you can just tell by the way they look at each other, the way they interact, there's something more there. It's all new and building but you can tell. And I mean the type of conversation they were having wasn't one you would have with someone you've been friends with for just two months. There's something there and that's something I'll have to deal with later."

"What were they talking about?" Adam asked.

"They don't know that I overheard their conversation. Clay had told Emma that when he was four, after his mother died, he was sent to live with Ash's parents in a small village in Liberia. They were aid workers in a camp in a war torn area."

"What? No, Ash wouldn't have sent him into a place like that. He might not have cared about Clay, but he wouldn't send him there." Adam instantly said.

"We knew he hated his parents. He hated that they were always more focused on other people and helping them rather than him. Said they lived in rundown homes because they spent their money on charities. We were surprised when he sent Clay to live with them, but it was better than him being a father. He said they were in Washington." Blackburn added.

"Either he lied about where they were living or he sent Clay off to live with strangers. Either way, Clay was in Africa." Jason could see the pain going across their face. It was clear that they had loved Clay when he was little and would have wanted to be in his life and there for him. To find out that Clay had grown up in Africa was only twisting the knife. Unfortunately what else Jason had to say wasn't going to make that any better.

"That son of a bitch. He knew me and Vic would have taken him, that we wanted him. He didn't have to send him anywhere, much less a country torn apart by endless wars and diseases." Adam said, shaking slightly.

"How long was he there for?"

"His grandparents were killed in a raid when he was six. All of the adults were killed and the children were captured. He spent fifteen months roughly having a rope around his wrists with a leash attached to one of the rebels. It was him and about ten other kids that weren't old enough to be soldiers. They spent fifteen months going around with the rebels and watching as they killed, tortured and raped people. After fifteen months they started to be trained. From six until fourteen he was a child soldier. What he was forced to do he didn't say, it was clear it was still very painful to talk about."

"Fuck." Adam said with nothing but pure pain in his voice. This was a kid that he had loved and wanted to adopt and raise. To hear that he spent eight years as a child soldier was heartbreaking and all he wanted to do was go and find Clay and hug him.

"How did he get out?" Blackburn asked with an edge to his voice.

"They were in a smaller village and there was this seven year old girl tied to a post. The whole village was there and the rebels. The leader told Clay to rape the girl, that if he didn't he would be whipped to death as a message to the village and the rebels. Clay went over and cut the girl down. The unit that I was in at the time were in the area and we had heard rumors of what was happening in the village. When we arrived we found that Clay had his wrists bound to the post and he was being whipped. He received sixty-four lashes to his back and he was barely alive when we got there. I held him as our medic worked on his back. We were able to get him to the aid camp and by the time we left he was going to live and they were going to keep him. I had no idea it was him. When he was cleared he got onto the aid plane and was brought back to the states. He lived in New York City on the streets for four years. He went to highschool and would forge Ash's signature when he needed to. Afterwards he went into the Navy so he could prevent other kids going through what he went through."

Adam was shaking, he couldn't do this right now. He headed out and the others looked after him. Jason felt horrible that he had upset Adam to that level. He had never seen him like this before and he had no idea that he had cared about Clay this much.

"This is hard to hear for me, I can't imagine what it's like for Adam. Me and Kate, we were there as much as we could but with me being Alpha One I had to go on more ops than Adam. Adam and Vic, they took care of Clay the most. He had his own room there, he was registered for school in their district. Clay called them Dad and Mom and they told everyone he was their son. Adam, he loves Hannah, but part of his heart has always had this piece missing from losing Clay. We told ourselves that he was happy and in a warm and safe place. When we found out he was in Green Team and he knew all of these languages, we figured he got the education and support he needed. Now it turns out he was living in hell and we didn't even know it. Clay is still his son to him." Blackburn explained.

"I had no idea he felt that strongly for him. I thought you both would have known Ash and maybe a bit about the kid. I'm sorry to tell you both like this. If it had been Mickey or Emma, I don't know what I would do." Jason said, feeling like crap.

"It's not your fault. Ash lied to us, he knew that Adam and Vic wanted to adopt Clay. He didn't want him, but he wasn't going to let anyone else have him either. I can't believe he did this. It's one thing to not want to raise a child, but to send him off to a country where he knew firsthand was being torn apart. How do you send a four year old little boy into that life?"

"Asking the wrong person that. What do you think about Clay being on the team? You think he'll be a good fit?"

"I might be a little biased on that. He's not what people think he is. He's got a lot of walls up and he's got trust issues, rightly so. I think Bravo needs his skills and I think he needs Bravo's love. He's smart, has serious skills with a rifle and he knows a lot of languages. He would fill a gap within the team. The question isn't if he'll fit into the team, it's if you want to take him on. He's young, the youngest tier one operator in history. He's still growing up into the man he wants to be and that will come with its own little problems. Are you prepared to handle him growing up still and his IQ? If you aren't ready or willing to take everything that comes with Clay, then you are better off letting him go to another team."

"That's just it, I don't know if I can let him go to another team. This is the kid that has haunted my dreams for nine years. Seeing this small fourteen year old boy almost whipped to death, I haven't been able to stop thinking about him. Now he's here and all he wants is to help people. I had to walk away from him once, I can't do that again."

"Then you don't. He's going to pass Green Team, he's in the top spot right now. If you want him, then start getting him used to the others on the team, because it will take him a bit to trust and build relationships. He's more inclined to be by himself then in a social gathering. I think you need to let him know that you overheard his conversation with Emma. He needs to know that you remember him. If he finds out later that you kept that from him, it'll break whatever trust you have built up."

"I know, I'll tell him. The team will start being around him and we can start getting him used to us being there. God, twenty-three and in this life." Jason said, worried about what it would do to Clay. He was still so young.

"It's a hard life, but it seems to be what he really wants. Enough that he was able to defy the odds. We teach him what we can and be there for the rough patches. That's all we can do."

Jason gave a nod in agreement. He would need to find a way and a time to talk to Clay and he would have to do it soon, because Blackburn was right, Clay would be pissed if he found out months later. Jason couldn't believe everything he had just learnt about Clay. He wasn't expecting this when he decided to ask Blackburn and Adam about Ash and a younger Clay. Now he had even more information and none of it was making him feel any better. It would seem like Clay would need a lot more support than he was expecting. That didn't change that he would be there for Clay and just hope that everything would work out ok.

Adam made his way out of the building. He needed to get some fresh air, he had to calm down. His whole body was shaking from pain and rage. He had fallen in love with Clay the very first moment his eyes laid on him. He couldn't describe how he felt, not until Hannah was born and he got to hold her in his arms. It was then that he realized that he had loved Clay instantly, that Clay was his son. He didn't even think about not going out on missions as often. He wanted to be home at night to see Clay. He wanted to be there to put Clay to bed at night or be there when he was sick. He was the one that helped Clay learn how to walk, how to talk and write. He was the one to get Clay his first bike. He wanted to be the one to teach Clay everything. He wanted to watch Clay grow up more than anything.

It broke his heart when he discovered that Clay had been sent off to Ash's parents. He wanted to raise Clay so badly and to know that he would be on the other side of the country was heartbreaking even more. Now it turned out to all be a lie. That his son wasn't living with good people in a safe and warm home. He had spent ten years living in a war zone. Eight of them as a child soldier where he had to do who knows what to survive. Only to be whipped and then homeless for four years in New York City. Adam wanted to kill Ash. He wanted to tear him apart and watch as he struggled to put himself back together. A quick death was not nearly enough for what he deserved.

When Adam had discovered that Clay was being placed in Green Team, he felt a warmth flooding through him. He hadn't heard about Clay being in the Seals because he was in Seal Team 3, placing him out in California. The grapevine was good, but it wasn't often they heard about Seal Teams out on the other side of the country. They focused on the ones located in Virginia. Having Clay in Green Team thrilled and terrified Adam, because this life was hard and he wasn't really sure it was one he wanted for Clay. He wanted him to be happy and healthy, but he also wanted him safe and not haunted by nightmares from this job. He suffered nightmares all the time to the point where he made the decision to be an instructor instead. He had to think of his mental health and the welfare of his family. To know that Clay was about to be a tier one operator and he had been a child soldier, he feared it would break Clay one day. He had to have nightmares from growing up in Africa, he had to be traumatised and have PTSD on some level. This life was the last thing Clay needed.

Adam had been walking around trying to get his thoughts in order and get his emotions back under control. He found Clay sitting at one of the picnic tables with a thick book in his hands. He wasn't reading though, but staring off into space. Adam knew that meant he was lost in thought. He used to do it all the time growing up when his little mind was trying to work out a problem that he couldn't solve. Adam couldn't help but smile at the sight of his son. To know that parts of him were still the same. Adam made his way over to Clay and spoke as he sat down.

"Boring book?"

Clay was brought out of his thoughts and he looked up at Adam. "Oh um… no it's actually a good book. It's about world politics back in the nineteen hundreds and how it led to both world wars. It then compares how those battles could have been fought in modern times and how close the modern world is to experiencing another world war."

"That sounds interesting if you like reading about politics. I prefer to avoid them." Adam said with a smirk.

"Most people do. But the military revolves around them, I find it's better to know them so you can use them to your advantage."

"Smart boy. So what had you so lost in your thoughts with a book like that?"

"It's nothing." Clay said and Adam knew he was putting his walls back up.

"Didn't look like nothing. Talk to me kid, what's going on in that big brain?"

Adam knew from even when Clay was little that if you pushed too hard with him he would clam up. Clay only needed a little bit of prodding to get him to open up about what was bothering him. You couldn't pressure him or it would only make his walls stronger. Clay let out a soft sigh before he spoke.

"I've spent basically my whole life on my own. I don't need anyone, I don't need family. I do just fine on my own. I was talking to my friend yesterday and it brought up memories from when I was younger. And now I can't stop thinking about it." Clay said with a pain in his voice.

"What kind of memories?" Adam asked gently, even though he was terrified inside.

"I don't remember much before the age of four, I mean it's not unusual. I haven't even thought about these memories for six years or so. I have this stuffed animal, a seal, and I've always had it since I can remember. I keep trying to donate it or toss it and I can't bring myself to do it. It's stupid because it's just a stuffed animal from growing up, I can't even remember its name, but I can't get rid of it. But I remember someone giving it to me."

"Ash?"

"No, God no. There was this man, but I can't see his face no matter how hard I try. He gave me it for some reason, an important reason, but what it was I can't remember. There are other memories of him and another woman, I can't see their faces but I remember them tucking me in at bed. She used to sing me a song every night. Going to a park and playing, reading together, going into their bed at night when I was scared. It should be my parents, these memories should be from my parents, but I know they aren't. They feel like my parents though. She feels like she's my mom and he feels like my dad. I don't know how they were in my life. I know I wasn't adopted, I remember Ash and Ericka. I remember not feeling safe around them, but then I did around the other two. I used to think about them all the time when life got hard. I used to dream about them rescuing me and making the pain go away. They never came though and after a while I told myself they weren't real. That it had to be my imagination. Now though, I can't help but wonder if I have parents out there somewhere. I don't know." Clay said and Adam could hear how confused and hurt he was with all of this.

Adam had plans of telling Clay about growing up after Green Team. He didn't want Clay being distracted while he was going through Green Team. Now he knew he had to tell Clay the truth. He couldn't let Clay be this confused and hurt by memories.

"You called him Theodore."

"What?" Clay asked, confused.

"The seal, you named him Theodore. I gave him to you when you were three, when you started to ask questions about my job. I told you I was a Seal and that I help keep people safe. You liked it because it reminded you of me while I was away. And you called him Theodore, we used to tease you about the name. Vic, your mom, we used to call him Theo for short and that led to a two hour conversation with you about how some people have a shorter version of their name and how some people don't. By the end of it you looked at us and said, nope it's Theodore, and you walked off. You took it everywhere and you always slept with it. We used to have to distract you with a new puzzle or a complicated math question just to put it into the wash so it wouldn't smell anymore." Adam said with a warm smile at the memory.

"It was you?" Clay asked, softly.

"Eric, Blackburn, and I were in the same unit as Ash. When we found out he had a son we both were worried about you. Ash was never someone you trusted a child with and he made it very clear he didn't want any. Ericka, she was addicted to heroin and a prostitute so we knew that she wouldn't be stable enough to care for you. Eric and I saw you that first time when you were a couple of days old. The second I held you in my arms I knew you were mine, that you belong with me and Vic. She knew it too when she held you that night. Over the next four years the four of us raised you when you weren't with Ash or Ericka. Eric was Alpha One and he always had to go on the ops and tour, but I had no problem staying home when an op came in. I couldn't avoid going on tour, but I could for the majority of ops. We had you as much as we could. Ash never cared, but when Ericka was back in your life she demanded to have you at her place. We didn't have a legal leg to stand on, even though Ash made us your godparents. When you were four we had enough and we were starting the procedure to have custody of you and adopt you."

"But you didn't. Did you change your mind?" Clay asked, the hurt flooding his voice. He had no idea how he felt about any of this. He had waited the majority of his childhood for those parents to show up and save him from the pain he was in. Now here was the man that was his dad growing up and Clay had no idea how to feel about it.

"No Clay, god no. I was away on an op for a week. When I got back we found out that Ericka had died while she was watching you. Ash had already shipped you off before we got back. He told us that you were in Washington with his parents. Vic and I were pissed, he knew we wanted to adopt you. He knew you loved us and we loved you. You called me Dad and you called Vic Mom, you had a room in our house, you were registered for school just down the street from us. You were our son and he knew it. Even after we found out we still went to the lawyer to see what we could do, but legally speaking you were with family and in another state. We had no legal rights to you. We tried to find his parents, even hired a private investigator, but we could never find them. We never stopped thinking about you. We never gave up hope that one day we would see you again. Whenever we moved, we always made sure we had an extra bedroom that was setup for you. We still do now. We have your photos up from when you were little. We told our daughter about you and how she has an older brother out there. We've never stopped loving you."

Clay couldn't stop the tear that went down his cheek. "I've always felt like something was missing. Like there's a hole inside of me and I was never going to fill it or be complete. Why didn't you tell me?"

"I was going to. I didn't know you were in the military. I didn't find out until I got the list for Green Team and saw your name. I wanted to tell you right away, but you were very guarded and I knew that Green Team was a lot to take. I didn't know how you were going to react and I didn't want you to react badly and then see me all the time on Green Team. I didn't want you to lose all the hard work you had put in to get here and not pass Green Team. I wanted to wait until you were done with Green Team and you could have the time to process the information. I also didn't know if you would remember anything from back then, you were so young. But I was going to tell you. It's up to you how you want to proceed with this Clay. There's no pressure on our end. We would love to have you in our lives, we would love to have you over for dinner so you can meet Hannah and be a part of our family again. But it's up to you if that is what you want or if you need time."

"I'm not the same person, I'm not four anymore. A lot has happened between then and now." Clay said with a deep pain in his voice.

Adam knew Clay was talking about his time as a child soldier. He wouldn't be able to bring it up, that was something Clay would need to open up about to him. Adam knew it wasn't going to be good memories and there was a high chance that Clay had killed someone long before he was old enough to handle it. There were scars that ran deep in him and they would never be healed. It didn't matter though, because he still loved him.

"We're not the same either. I don't know what your life has been like since Ash took you away from us. I do know that we love you no matter what you tell us. You will always be our son and you will always be a member of our family. There isn't anything you could tell us that would change that son. Not a damn thing." Adam said, with strength in his voice.

"I don't… I don't know what to do right now." Clay admitted.

"And that's ok. I don't expect an answer right now Clay, I don't. I just wanted you to know the truth, take all the time you need. You have my address and you are welcome over anytime you want. Just come by and Vic and I will answer any questions you have."

Clay just gave a nod and Adam knew that Clay needed some time to process everything. Adam could understand that, it was a lot to take in for anyone, but especially after everything Clay went through it would be hard. Adam got up and as badly as he wanted to hug Clay he knew that Clay wouldn't be up for that just yet. Adam placed a hand on Clay's shoulder and gave it a soft squeeze before he did the hardest thing he might have ever had to do, he walked away from his son that was hurting. Adam wanted to bring Clay home with him, but he knew that it had to be Clay's choice. Adam couldn't force this on him, it had to be something Clay wanted. He just hoped that Clay would want to be in their life and they could finally have their son back.


	2. Chapter 2

Adam arrived home just before Hannah would be getting in from school. He wanted the time to be able to talk to Victoria about what he had learned today about Clay and to tell her about his conversation with Clay. He knew that Vic was going to take this hard when she discovered that Clay had been a child soldier. Clay was her son, she loved him and wanted to raise him and be there as he grew up. When she found out that Clay was in the Seals and going in Green Team she was thrilled to know that he was back in the same city, but also worried about him living this life. Adam was also worried about it, having first hand experience with being in the teams, he knew it was a hard life. It would be even harder with Clay being so young. Twenty-three might not seem young, but it was to be in this life. Adam really wished he could talk to Clay and make sure he understood everything that he was getting in for with being in a tier one team.

Adam walked in and saw his wife in the kitchen getting things organized and ready for dinner. She gave him a warm smile as he walked in.

"Hey, you're home early."

"Ya, I wanted to talk to you before Hannah got here. It's about Clay." Adam said, as he closed the door and made his way over to his wife.

"What about him? Is he ok, did he get injured?" Victoria instantly asked, fear gripping her heart.

"No he didn't get hurt today. He's doing really well, so well I wish he wasn't. I told him about growing up, I finally told him about us."

"I thought you said you wanted to wait until he was out of Green Team."

"I was, but then I saw him sitting outside with a book, he was lost in thought. I got him talking and he remembered us from growing up. He remembered being in our home and us raising him, but he couldn't picture our faces. He was talking about how he felt like he had parents out there, that he had this hole inside of him that he couldn't fix. He talked about Theodore and how he couldn't remember his name just that he couldn't bring himself to get rid of him. I had to tell him. I couldn't keep it from him anymore. Not when he remembered growing up with us."

"He remembered us? He was so young, I didn't think he would remember anything. He still has Theodore?" Victoria asked with a warm smile, as tears were building in her eyes.

"He does. I told him how we called him Theo and had to explain to him about shortened names. I told him how we wanted to adopt him and he asked if we had changed our minds."

"Oh sweetie." Victoria said, as she closed her eyes from the pain that was in her heart.

"I told him we didn't. That Ash had sent him away knowing we wanted to adopt him. That we tried to find him, but we never could. I told him how we have always had a room for him where we lived, that he could come over whenever he wanted."

"He must be so confused."

"He is. He's trying to wrap his head around it. He did say he felt like those people in his memories were his parents and now he knows that it was us. It's just going to take him some time to process. He's probably feeling a lot of fear right now."

"Why fear?" Victoria asked worried now that Clay would be afraid of them or anything that had to do with them.

"This is the part that I don't want Hannah to know and Clay has no idea that I know. I didn't want to bring it up until he brought it up. He has to feel ready for that and that he can trust us with it. Jason asked Eric and me this morning about Clay when he was younger. Jason overheard Clay and Emma yesterday talking. Turns out that they have been friends for the past couple of months. Clay wasn't in Washington with his grandparents, he was in Africa, Liberia, with his grandparents. Or possible grandparents."

"Liberia, haven't they been at war for decades?" Victoria asked worried as hell now.

"They have been. Clay lived with his supposed grandparents at an aid camp within Liberia. The area was war torn with rebels coming in and killing and raping people. When he was six his grandparents were killed and he was captured. They turned him into a child soldier." Adam told his wife gently.

"No, oh god no." Victoria immediately said with tears flooding her eyes.

"Clay didn't talk about anything he had to do. But he spent fifteen months roughly with his hands bound by rope attached to a leash to one of the other soldiers. He was taken around to see all the murder, torture and rape. They started to train him after those fifteen months. He was with them until he was fourteen. He was brought to a village and the leader tied a seven year old girl to a post and had everyone in the village there for the show. He told Clay that he was to rape her or he would be whipped to death. Clay let the girl go. His wrists were bound to the post and he was whipped, sixty-four times, before a seal team arrived and stopped it."

"He was whipped? Where?" Victoria asked, the tears were freely flowing down her cheeks now.

Adam spoke as he went over to his wife and wrapped his arms around her. "His back. Jason was within the seal team, they had heard rumors of what was going on in the village. They killed the rebels that were there and Jason worked with their medic to help Clay. He was the one that held him and told him he was ok. He left Clay with another aid worker camp so he could recover. After he was recovered he got onto an aid plane and came back to the States. He lived in New York City on the streets for four years while he went to high school and then he went into boot camp."

"Our son was whipped." Victoria said, as she cried.

Adam held her close as he spoke. "I know, but he's here now and he's grown into one hell of a man. He knows the truth now and we can be there for him. We'll get him back in our lives and we'll help him through whatever life throws his way."

Adam continued to hold onto his wife as she cried over the pain that their son had to of gone through growing up. A pain that they could have prevented if Ash had only just let them have Clay. He could have grown up never knowing this level of pain. Never knowing the horrors that are in the world. A few minutes later the door was opening and Hannah walked in. She was instantly on alert to see her mom crying.

"Mom, what's wrong?"

"Nothing honey, I'm fine. Your dad was just telling me how he told Clay about us raising him growing up." Victoria said, as she wiped her eyes.

"Really? I thought you weren't going to say anything yet." Hannah said, confused.

Ever since she was little she had been told that she had an older brother named Clay, but he didn't live with them. She had seen his photos that they had of him, but they didn't have anything past the age of four. Hannah could tell over the years that there were times when the absence of Clay had affected them. Everytime it was his birthday they would be sad. On holidays when they celebrated with the family they always set a place for Clay at the table. The empty bedroom that no one slept in just in case Clay did come home to them. You could tell they were missing a child and it had been hard over the years on Hannah. She wished she could have made that pain go away, but there was nothing she could do about it. When they had told her two months ago that Clay was in town and training to be a Tier One operator Hannah was excited. It meant that maybe the pain in her parents' eyes would finally go away. But then her parents said they couldn't tell him yet. That chances were he wouldn't remember them and telling him during this key part in his career could jeopardize it. She had accepted that they would have to wait until he passed Green Team, but having Clay this close was only adding to their pain. She was thrilled to know that he finally knows the truth.

"I wasn't, but today Clay was talking about memories he has from when he was younger and I couldn't keep quiet. He remembered us, but he couldn't picture our faces. It was a bit of a shock to him and he's still processing." Adam explained.

"Does that mean I'll finally get to meet him?" Hannah asked, hopefully.

"I'm not sure baby. It's up to him when he's ready to come by. He knows where we live and I told him he can come by anytime he wants. He knows the truth now and it's his decision on if he wants to be a part of our family." Adam answered.

"So we can't do anything?" Hannah asked, not liking that at all.

"All we can do is be willing to be there for him when he is ready. How was school?" Victoria asked.

"It was fine. I have homework to do as usual. Why I took Spanish I'll never know." Hannah said as she rolled her eyes.

"Because you had to take a language course and it was better than all of us trying to learn Chinese." Adam said with a smirk.

"True." Hannah said, as she shrugged and headed for her room.

"Are you ok?" Adam asked his wife once they were alone again.

"I'll be fine. It's just a lot to take in and if it's a lot for me I can't imagine how Clay feels. Would the Navy know about him being a child soldier?"

"It would have been in his file, they probably sealed that part away. He would have had to go through a full medical exam, they would have found his scars from the whip. I'm worried about it. He has to go through SERE training to pass Green Team, what if that triggers something inside of him? He would have seen torture growing up he probably went through it. I don't know if he could handle it again, even in a control setting. I mean, it's one thing to go through it for real in the field and be able to block your mind from it and another for it happening because it's part of training. SERE is designed to ensure that soldiers won't break even during light torture, but Clay's been through real torture. The mindframe is different and I'm worried him going through SERE will trigger memories all for nothing."

"I know SERE training is important, but like you said there's a difference in mindframe. Someone could excel at SERE and cave the second they are presented with real torture, one that doesn't have a safe word. I hate the thought of Clay going through that when he would have already been through something much worse. Is there no way out of it for him?"

"Everyone has to go through it. The Upper Brass are the ones that decide if someone can be exempt, but no one ever has. Normally I'm right there doing it, but I'll have to excuse myself from it. I can't be there and watch that happen to him or cause him pain like that. All I can do is be there for him afterwards no matter the outcome."

"And we will be, hopefully he will let us be there for him." Victoria said with a sad smile.

"He will, he just needs some time. Come on, I'll help you make dinner."

"I'm making spaghetti." Victoria said with a small smile.

"That was his favorite. I remember it was the only thing he would eat for like three months." Adam said with a warm smile at the memory.

Victoria gave a small laugh at the memory. They had been so terrified that he would be malnourished with only wanting the pasta dish for food. Eventually he grew out of the phase, but it was still his favorite. Together they worked on getting dinner ready and they just hoped that one day they would get to see Clay again in their life.

It was nearing five at night and Clay was sitting in his car out front of Adam's place. Clay didn't know how he felt about any of this. He had been waiting his whole life practically to finally know who those people in his memories were. Wondering if he maybe did have parents out there that would love him and want him in their life. He never expected to actually find the people in his memories. He never expected that his father would be Adam, his Green Team instructor. It made everything so messy and confusing. Clay had no idea how he felt about it, how he felt about all of this, but he did know that he wanted to know more. He wanted to figure out if he could be in their lives, if he could be in their family again. He had dreamt of getting a hug from that man and woman from his memories again, to feel that safety and love again.

That desire to know if he could have parents again was what brought him here to their house. He had to know, he needed to know. Clay got out of his car and headed for the door. He had no idea how this was going to go over, but he was hoping it wouldn't end in disaster. He knocked on the door and after a moment it opened to reveal Adam. A slight shock that went across Adam's face quickly disappeared and grew into a warm smile. Before Clay could even say anything Adam was pulling him in for a hug. The second Adam's strong arms were wrapped around him Clay felt nothing but pure love and safety. He had no idea what came over him but he couldn't stop the tears that poured down his face. He wrapped his arms around Adam and placed his forehead against his shoulder.

"It's ok. It's ok son, it's all gonna be ok." Adam said warmly as he held tighter onto Clay.

Adam couldn't hold his own tears back at finally being able to hold onto his son after all of these years. After a few moments Clay pulled back and wiped at his eyes.

"Sorry." Clay said embarrassed that he had cried.

"Don't even. It's not the first time I've had you crying on my shoulder and it won't be the last. That's part of a dad's job." Adam said warmly.

Victoria came around the corner and stopped dead in her tracks at seeing Clay. She didn't need to be told who this man was, she just knew it, she could feel it. This was her son, finally. She went right over to him and Clay easily opened his arms for her to hug him. She easily wrapped her arms around him and Clay held her tight.

"Oh my sweetie." Victoria said, with tears in her eyes.

"Hi Mom." Clay whispered back. He couldn't believe how amazing it felt to be hugged by her again. He remembered her hugs the most. She even smelt the same.

After a moment Clay pulled back and gave Victoria a warm smile as he spoke. "You smell the same."

"You remember my perfume?" Victoria asked, warmly.

"Ya, every now and then I swear I could smell it."

"Your dad got it for me when we were sixteen. He's bought me the same one ever since." Victoria said with a warm smile.

"I'm sorry for just dropping by without calling first." Clay started, but Adam cut him off.

"I told you to come by anytime you want. This is your home too Clay."

"And you are just in time for dinner. I'm making spaghetti, I hope you still like it." Victoria said, as she headed over to the kitchen.

"It's my favorite actually. But I don't have to stay if this is a bad time." Clay said, not wanting to put them out.

"It's never a bad time for you to be here. Come on, you can help me set the table." Adam said, with a comforting squeeze to Clay's shoulder.

Clay followed Adam into the kitchen and grabbed the dishes for the table. They heard someone coming down the stairs and Clay saw a teenage girl, around sixteen coming down the stairs with long wavy brown hair. Clay knew that Adam had a daughter named Hannah and he figured this was her. He had no idea how she was going to react to him being here. He grew up as an only child, but he always wondered what it would be like to have a sibling. Someone that he could be close with and could experience life with. He didn't get that and he knew now it would be different, still he was hoping that Hannah would be ok with him.

"Hey baby." Adam started, but Hannah cut him off.

"Oh my god, Clay?" Hannah asked with a warm smile.

"Hey, Hannah right?" Clay said.

"Oh my god, it's really you, you're really here." Hannah said with a huge smile as she went over and threw her arms around Clay.

Clay was surprised but easily hugged her back. He wasn't sure how any of this was going to go, but he was glad that it seemed to be starting out well. He knew there would be problems along the way, but he was hoping it wouldn't be too rocky that he could lose his family all over again.

"It's good to finally meet you." Hannah said with a warm smile as she pulled back.

"It's good to meet you." Clay said back.

"Dinner is ready, let's sit down and eat." Victoria said, as she brought the food over.

They all headed to the table and Clay sat next to Hannah with Adam and Victoria across from them. After they got their food Hannah started.

"So spill, what do you do for fun? Do you have a girlfriend? Where do you live? Come on spill."

Adam gave a chuckle to that. "Let the poor guy get a bite first."

"It's fine. I live in the barracks right now while I'm in Green Team." Clay started and then took a bite to eat.

"Do you live there after Green team?" Hannah asked.

"No, he'll have to find an apartment." Adam answered.

"Assuming you make it. What happens if you don't?" Hannah asked.

"I'll make it. I didn't come this far to fail. And this tastes amazing." Clay said warmly to Victoria.

"It's always been your favorite. When you were three it was the only thing you would eat for three months. We were able to get you to eat cereal in the morning, but after that it was spaghetti, it didn't even have to be warm." Victoria said warmly.

"Now the only spaghetti that I eat comes from a can." Clay said.

"Ew." Hannah instantly said.

"Pretty much, but it only requires me to warm it up to eat. That's about as far as my cooking skills go."

"You can't cook?" Adam asked.

Clay shook his head and Adam spoke again. "You have a genius level IQ, how can you not cook?"

"I had every intention of learning. I was gonna take a class, but I was always getting spun up so it never worked out. Whenever I try to cook something I get distracted or I start thinking about something and forget that I'm cooking so it normally ends up burnt. Like, I burnt water once and it almost started a fire from the pot melting."

"Seriously? How do you get distracted while cooking?" Hannah asked.

"It happens a lot, more often then it probably should. I'll start thinking about something and then I forget that I'm doing something and before I know it, it's been a couple of hours. I've done it doing other things too." Clay said with a small shrug.

"Not while driving though right?" Victoria asked, worried now.

"No, no, not while driving. Passenger seat I have, but never while I'm doing the driving."

"But what are you thinking about that has you so distracted?" Hannah asked.

"Anything. It could be an op that I went on, it could be a book I was reading. It could be completely random where a thought will pop in my head and that will lead me to another one and another one that somehow all connects to the first thought. My mind tends to always be going unless I'm working or reading, it can be hard to sleep from it. I'm still trying to figure out how to shut it off."

"It can be hard for some people to let things go, especially when you have a higher IQ. You used to have trouble sleeping when you were younger. It seemed like you couldn't get your mind to go quiet. Part of that is learning how to compartmentalize." Adam said; he was worried about how well Clay was coping with what he had seen in his life.

"I'm learning." Clay said with a nod.

"Well, I would be happy to teach you how to cook if you'd like. There's plenty of simple things you can make that shouldn't take too long for you." Victoria said with a warm smile.

"I might take you up on that." Clay said, with a warm smile back.

"So what is Green Team like? Is it really hard?" Hannah asked.

"It's different compared to what boot camp and Buds were like. They were all about doing things on your own, but Green Team seems to be more about teamwork so it was different to get used to. I'm still getting used to it."

"You're a lot better than you were when you started. Seal Teams are more about a group of Seals working together, but you aren't family. Tier One teams are a family, on and off mission. Your family is everyone's family. And it can be a lot to take in if you aren't used to it. You are doing really well though." Adam said supportively.

"Thanks. It's been hard getting used to it. Plus dealing with a roommate."

"You have a roommate?" Victoria asked.

"Ya, we're all doubled up. Roberts." Clay said with a nod to Adam.

Adam groaned at hearing who Clay had gotten stuck with.

"Yup." Clay said.

"Is he a bad roommate?" Hannah asked.

"He not only has the impressive ability to snore like a train, but he also talks in his sleep."

"And he stinks." Adam added.

"Horrible. What the hell is wrong with him?" Clay asked.

"Ew he smells?" Hannah said, disgusted.

"All the time. He's riding the middle right now for ranking so if he makes it through the rest of Green Team he'll end up on a team. I don't know what team he'll get, but they'll kill him. Just for the smell alone, and that is before you factor in his sleeping habits." Adam said.

"Is the snoring and talking that bad?" Victoria asked Clay.

"Yes and no. Ear plugs will work, but he has another habit that is disturbing at times."

"Like what?" Hannah asked.

"Um…" Clay started, but he wasn't really sure how to word this.

"Does he really do it? It's in his file, but I thought it was bullshit." Adam asked.

"Nope he really does it. Like almost every night. I've woken up a few times in the middle of the night and he's on my bed doing it, next to me." Clay said, not really happy about it.

"Doing what?" Victoria asked this time.

"Did you report it?" Adam asked, not happy about this.

"I did, but it's a medical condition so there's nothing they can do about it. And no one is volunteering to switch. It's only for three more weeks and then I'll be able to find my own place." Clay said with a shrug.

"You have a perfectly good bedroom here you can stay in. You shouldn't be stuck dealing with that, especially if he's going to your bed. I know you can handle your own, but he's twice your size. He shouldn't be rooming with anyone." Adam said.

"Ok, what does he do?" Victoria asked, now very interested.

"He's got a mental condition that some shrink has cleared. It's called Parasomnia, basically he masturbates and can have sex while sleeping." Adam finally answered.

"Eww." Hannah instantly said.

"And you've woken up to him on your bed doing it?" Victoria asked, now worried as well.

"About a handful of times." Clay answered.

"You're not staying there anymore. You got a bedroom here that you can stay in for as long as you want. We'll grab your stuff tomorrow." Adam said.

"Ya seriously that's creepy and not to mention gross." Hannah said.

"Why would they allow him to be in the military?" Victoria asked.

"There are certain conditions that eliminate you from being in the military, but his isn't one of them. It's something that could happen when he's sleeping and unfortunately even if he did something to someone else, the Upper Brass are covered because it's in his Jacket. They are putting people at risk by allowing him to sleep with others in the same room. I don't know what team he'll end up with, but it won't go well. I don't know any team that will deal with it." Adam explained.

"Sweetie, you need to stay here. You should not be put in that position." Victoria said to Clay.

"I'll grab my things tomorrow." Clay agreed, he was very happy to not sleep in the same room as him anymore.

"Ok, so moving on to something less disturbing. Girlfriend? Or boyfriend, not judging." Hannah said with a smirk.

"Girls, and not right now."

"No? I thought you had a girl, Stella?" Adam asked, confused.

"We broke up last week, a difference of opinion."

"I'm sorry sweetie. What was the difference?" Victoria asked.

"We had been together for three months and in my opinion we weren't sleeping with anyone else and in her opinion it was ok to still sleep with Professor Tom."

"Ouch." Adam grimaced.

"Ya that sucks." Hannah agreed.

"I'm sorry sweetie." Victoria said.

"It's all good. Better to find out early on then a couple of years down the line. Besides, right now is probably a bad time to be in a relationship. I got enough in my life to figure out and get into a new routine with Green Team coming to an end."

"I think that's a good way of looking at it. You got a lot that's coming up, you need to be fully focused on that and not having your thoughts pulled away from the missions. The missions are hard and you need to be one hundred percent focused on it. I couldn't do it after Hannah was a few years old. I kept thinking about dying and leaving them with that mess. It was time for me to get out." Adam said.

"Ya I get that. I've seen a few guys in Team Three stay in too long and get seriously hurt. I think it's harder when you have a family to stay fully focused and in it. I don't know if I could do it." Clay said honestly.

"I think it takes a special kind of man that can do it. One day you'll cross that bridge and you'll see." Victoria said, warmly.

"Just don't cross that bridge anytime soon." Adam said, with a serious tone.

Clay gave a soft chuckle to that. "No, definitely not anytime soon."

"Good, I'm too young to be a grandpa. And that goes for you as well." Adam said, as he pointed to Hannah.

Hannah held her hands up in defence as she spoke. "Hey, I don't even have a boyfriend."

"Do you have any favorite movies or hobbies Clay?" Victoria asked.

"No hobbies and I don't really have any favorite movies."

"What kind of movies do you have?" Hannah asked.

"Um, a variety and some classics. Star Wars, Star Trek, Lord of the Rings, the Hobbits, any war movie, a bunch of documentaries and most of them are in different languages."

"Different languages? How many do you speak?" Hannah asked.

"Including English, ten."

"Wow, how high is your IQ?" Hannah asked, shocked that he knew so many languages. She could barely figure out Spanish.

"It's up there." Clay answered vaguely, but Hannah wasn't letting this go.

"So like Einstein high? I mean he had an IQ of what, one-sixty?"

"He did." Clay agreed and Adam smirked.

"Ok, so higher or lower?" Hannah pressed.

"She's not gonna stop until you answer her." Adam pointed out.

"I see that." Clay said with a smirk.

"You do know you make it seem worse when you don't answer." Hannah pressed.

"I find answering makes it worse." Clay said back.

"It's a safe place in this family sweetie. No one is going to hold anything against you. You can be honest here, just like we all are." Victoria said, gently.

Clay let out a soft breath before he spoke. "One-seventy-seven."

Everyone but Adam was shocked to hear how high it was. Adam had heard about it from Jason, but when he did hear it he was shocked. He knew Clay was gifted when he was younger, but to hear that he was that gifted and never received the education that he desperately needed or deserved, it hurt. Clay could have been anything and he chose to be a Seal, he chose to risk his life for this country and Adam was really hoping later he would be able to talk to Clay and find out more about why he did choose this life.

"Holy crap." Hannah said, breaking the moment of silence.

"Yup." Clay simply said.

"We knew you were gifted when you were three, but I had no idea your IQ would be that high. I feel like we should have done more when you were younger to help you." Victoria said, feeling like she had let Clay down slightly.

"You did help. I don't remember much, but I do remember a lot of books and math problems and watching TV in different languages. I was so young, you couldn't have done anything different." Clay said warmly.

"So many shows in Spanish and yet I can't speak it." Adam said, and Clay gave a small chuckle to that.

"Not as easy as people think." Clay said with a smirk.

"You speak Spanish?" Hannah asked with bright eyes.

"Yup."

"Oh perfect, I am like two F's away from failing Spanish." Hannah said.

"I'll help you out." Clay easily agreed.

They had long since finished eating but none of them held any interest in getting up and going their separate ways. Hannah sat back and turned to look at Clay as she spoke.

"Ok so guilty pleasure movie. And don't say you don't have one, everyone does."

"Fine, but no laughing." Clay said, turning in his chair as well.

"I swear." Hannah promised.

"It's not really one movie, but it's Disney movies, like the old Disney movies."

"Shut up." Hannah said with a huge smile.

"Seriously?" Adam asked, shocked.

"No judging." Clay said back.

"I'm not judging. I didn't expect that answer though." Adam said with a smile.

"Why Disney movies?" Victoria asked.

"Ya, I mean didn't you get enough of them from growing up?" Hannah added.

"I didn't see them when I was younger; there was no TV. On my eighteenth birthday I enlisted and was shipped off the next day to boot camp. The day of my graduation I was picked for BUDS so I went straight there for six months and then placed on Seal Team Three. When I got out of BUDS I didn't really have a place lined up so I found this studio apartment that was furnished in this horrible part of town. But it was my first apartment and it came with my first TV. It only had a VCR and some old VHS tapes, but at that point I hadn't really seen any movies so it didn't bother me."

Adam noticed that Hannah was about to ask why he hadn't had a TV or movies, but a subtle shake of his head kept her quiet. He wasn't sure if Clay was ready to talk about that yet and Adam wasn't sure he wanted his daughter to know about it. Clay didn't even notice the transaction between the two of them as he continued.

"It was my third mission with the team, so I was still eighteen and learning how to even be in the field. Which was an issue because everyone else had close to ten years on me, so if something went wrong they would always blame me, even if I wasn't there. It was one of those missions where everything went wrong from the second we touched down. There were more targets in the building then intel had, instead of a dozen there were close to forty of them, all armed. The mission was a complete failure. One of the guys on the team was killed, I was injured."

"Injured how?" Adam asked.

"It was stupid. A target got the jump on me somehow. One second he wasn't behind me and Jackson had cleared the area, but then all of a sudden this guy was behind me. He was huge, close to three hundred in muscle mass and he had a knife with a blade that was about five inches. I still don't know how I screwed up and missed him, but he attacked me, I lost my gun, we fought and I ended up killing him. But he had broken two of my ribs and cracked three even with my plate on. I had a concussion, sprained hand and he had sliced me a few times that had to be stitched. It wasn't anything crazy serious, but it sucked. When we got back I was feeling pretty down so I thought I would put on a movie to try and fall asleep to. I ended up picking Aladdin. I knew it was a kid's movie so I figured I would be asleep in minutes. But I couldn't take my eyes off the screen."

"Why?" Hannah asked.

"It made the day suck less. It was the first time I could just be at peace and enjoy watching something that ended in a positive way. Disney movies were simple in that sense. The bad guys always got what they deserved and the good guys got their happy ending. It makes those bad days more bearable. Ever since I've been collecting them and I will still watch them when I need a little break from all of the stress or darkness within the world." Clay answered honestly.

"I think that's important, especially with the job that you do. You need something that will make the darkness a little brighter and something you can escape in." Victoria said.

"Ya I guess that makes sense. If I had to be in your line of work, I'd want to watch something that I knew would turn out ok too." Hannah agreed.

"So what about you? You're sixteen?" Clay asked, looking to get the attention off from himself.

"I am, second year of high school."

"How is that going?"

"As good as to be expected. I'm passing my classes and I'm not getting into trouble." Hannah said with a shrug.

"Not a school person?" Clay asked.

"I like seeing my friends." Hannah said with a smile and that was all Clay needed to hear.

"She is doing her best, but it would be good if you had a rough idea of what you were planning on doing for College." Adam said with a slight hint that Hannah needed to start thinking big picture.

"I know, I know. I just don't know yet. I also have to start to figure out my community service hours. You know it's crazy that I have to start trying to plan a future at sixteen."

"I know, but you have to have some sort of an idea for your courses next year." Victoria said sympathetically.

"It is crazy that people are expected to know what they want for the next sixty years of their life at sixteen. We're completely different people then we were at sixteen and viewpoints change. It's a lot of stress on someone so young." Clay commented.

"I can be, especially when you have no idea what you want to do. Have you always wanted to be a Seal?" Hannah asked.

"Um… for the most part. I met my first Seal team when I was fourteen and I got to see how much good they were doing. I knew I was different to other kids my age. I didn't really know why I was so smart, but I knew it wasn't normal. I thought about being a teacher or maybe a doctor, something that would allow me to use my intelligence, but I wanted to have more of an impact on a global scale. I wanted to be able to reach children in war zones and try and help them. Being in the military would allow me to do that, from there I decided to be a Seal after seeing them when I was fourteen."

"That's cool, so you became a Seal to help kids, I like that." Hannah said with a warm smile.

"You know for your community service hours you could volunteer at a charity that focuses on kids." Victoria suggested.

"Ya maybe. I'll look into some charities and see." Hannah said with a shrug.

"I heard you do charity work, is that right son?" Adam asked. He was trying to make a point of referring to Clay as son right now so Clay understood that he was a part of this family. That he was loved and wanted.

"I do a lot of charity work ya. In California I just happen to come upon a charity that focuses on global crimes against children. They focus on child labor, human trafficking, child brides and child soldiers. They raise funds for various charities all over the world that focus on those specific areas to help improve the life of children everywhere. It's a great organization that I've been working with since I was eighteen."

"That sounds cool. What type of stuff have you done for them?" Hannah asked.

"I do what I can. They have a lot of different fundraisers that they do and I'm usually involved in about thirty of them a year, sometimes more if I have the downtime. Right now while I'm in Green Team I've been doing a lot more in this area just because I have the extra time. I've done charity sports games like basketball, volleyball, baseball and golf. I've done dinners and galas, things like that."

"You play golf?" Adam asked.

"I do. I started about four years ago. Do you play?"

"I do. I'm not too good at it, but I'm trying to improve. We should play before you get out of Green Team and will be spun up all the time." Adam said with a warm smile.

"Ya sounds like fun." Clay agreed.

"Why did you learn?" Victoria asked.

"Most business deals are done on a golf course compared to a boardroom nowadays. It was strategic for me to learn so I could generate more donations for the charity. But also for later on in life to build connections with various businessmen and politicians."

"Politicians?" Adam questioned.

"I'd like to one day be an Admiral. After running my own team and putting in my twenty or twenty-five years, I'd like to move into a position where I can help improve how the military operates for future generations. Having political connections can help with that. Plus the Upper Brass really likes it if you have political connections."

"That's very true they do like people that can play well with the politicians that we get. It's good that you are thinking long term and what that future could look like. Especially in twenty years from now you could have a wife and some kids, being in an Admiral position would allow you to stay safe and be there for them. I know a lot of team guys don't like to think about life outside of the team, to them it would be like death. But I think it's important to understand that your life doesn't end because you aren't in the team anymore. It is possible to be in another position and still enjoy it." Adam said.

"It's good that you can see another path in your life, I think it's a very smart thing to do." Victoria agreed.

"Do you have any charity events coming up?" Hannah asked.

"I have three over the next three weeks. Saturday I have a baseball game, next Saturday I have a concert and then the Saturday after that I have a car race."

"A car race?" Adam asked for clarity.

"I am a certified race car driver. I'll be doing a five hundred race." Clay said with a big smile.

"Like with an actual race car?" Victoria asked, interested but also worried about Clay's safety.

"Ya. So it's twenty drivers, all of us are amature race car drivers, but have been certified to drive them. The cars are all donated by Nascar drivers and they get different decals for the race. They raise money from corporate donations as well as ticket prices. I've done it a few times out in California, but never here yet. It tends to do really well in terms of fundraising."

"That's awesome. Can anyone buy tickets?" Hannah asked, with a big smile.

"Ya, it's open to the public and it all goes towards the charity. That one is for child soldiers and getting them out."

"We'll have to get some tickets and watch you. Have you ever won?" Victoria asked.

"I've come in third a couple of times."

"We'll make sure we're there to support you." Adam said.

Clay gave a small smile in return. He wasn't used to having someone there to support him or cheer him on. He was used to doing everything on his own. It would take him some getting used to, but he was liking having this connection with someone. To be able to sit down and have a normal family dinner was really nice, and a first for him. Victoria moved first to start cleaning up the table and everyone helped to get the leftovers in the fridge and get the dishes cleaned up. With everything cleaned and put away, Adam grabbed two beers and headed out onto the back deck with Clay. He wanted to be able to talk to him one on one and make sure this was a road he wanted to go down.

Adam handed Clay a beer as he sat down in one of the chairs and spoke. "Never thought the day would come where I could share a beer with my son."

"How is this gonna work at work? I'm not really sure what the protocol is here." Clay said, feeling unsure as he took the offered beer.

"You gotta still refer to me as my normal title while you're in Green Team. Afterwards you can call me Adam or dad, whichever you are comfortable with. I know it's a lot for you to take in right now and there's no pressure on my end. And in terms of evaluation, that will be done by another instructor to ensure I'm not biased, which I wouldn't be. But it's better to cover all bases so no one can turn around later and claim I played favorites."

"Is it weird for you to have me in Green Team?"

"I wouldn't call it weird no. I'm scared for you and what you could go through. I've been Alpha One, I know what it's like and the type of missions you go on. So I'm worried about your physical and mental health. It's a hard life and as a father I want to protect you from it. Having you in Green Team has been really nice. It's allowed me to get to know you and see what kind of man you grew into. I'm not liking the idea of you going through SERE training, that scares me."

"That doesn't scare me." Clay simply said.

"It should. It's not just sleep deprivation, it's beatings and waterboarding. It can be a lot for people to take." Adam said gently.

"But that's the thing, it's light beatings and light waterboarding. I get why they have to do it, but it's not the same as real torture. SERE is just an act. There's no real damage done and the waterboarding doesn't even reach dangerous levels and on top of that you have a safe word to pull out and stop. It's not real torture, there's nothing to actually fear."

"With how calmly you can say that, it terrifies me that you've gone through the real thing." Adam said gently. He wasn't sure what Clay had experienced growing up as a child soldier. Just like he wasn't sure if Clay would tell him about it, so he had to be cautious on where he took this conversation.

"I've been through a lot." Clay said with a small shrug and Adam could tell he was trying to figure out how much he should tell him and how much he should keep to himself. Clay was afraid that if he told him the truth, he would lose him.

"You know son, you can tell me anything. And I mean anything. I'm never going to hold it against you or let it change how I feel about you. If something bad happened to you, you can tell me. I'm here to help carry that burden, that weight on your shoulders and on your heart."

Before Clay even knew it, a few tears were going down his cheeks. He wiped them away as he spoke. "Sorry, I don't know why it's affecting me like this. I've told this story a couple dozen times, it doesn't affect me anymore."

"What did I say about apologising for tears? This is something that is clearly causing you pain still, talk to me Clay. Let me help you take some of that pain."

"I don't want to hurt you, I don't want you blaming yourself, because it's not your fault. It's Ash's."

Adam reached over and placed his hand on Clay's knee. "Son, I would rather hurt with you, then for you to be hurting all on your own. I can take the pain, I can take the hurt. What I can't handle is you suffering all alone when I could do something to help you. You can tell me anything, always."

Clay wiped his cheeks again before finally speaking. "I wasn't in Washington with my grandparents. Ash had sent me to live with them, but they were in Africa, more specifically on the border of Liberia and Sierra Leone."

"You grew up around war." Adam said gently.

"I grew up in war. They worked at an aid camp and I lived there with them for two years. When I was six the camp was attacked by rebels and all of the adults were killed. There were a couple of kids there with me and we were taken by the rebels. I was taken by the rebels. I was with them until I was fourteen." Clay said with a great pain flooding his voice.

Adam rubbed his hand on Clay's knee to try and offer some comfort. "You were a soldier for them?" He asked gently.

Clay gave a nod, looking down at the beer bottle in his hands. "Not at first. Apparently I was too young, but they weren't gonna let me go. They knew I was American and they figured I couldn't understand them when I never talked. I let them believe I didn't know the language. They kept a rope around my wrists at all times and they had a rope attached to it that was then attached to another older soldier. I was always stuck with the same guy. Zimbey, he was forty and smelt horrible, like rotting flesh. He never let me out of his sight for those fifteen months. Whenever I got to shower he was always right there in the shower with me." Clay said as his voice shook.

"Did he." Adam couldn't even finish that sentence. His stomach was in his throat right now at what the answer could be.

Clay let out a shaky breath before he spoke. "Until I was fourteen. He used to make me sleep on the floor next to his bed. He wouldn't let me eat or drink until I did what he wanted. He used to make me watch as he raped other kids. I don't… I don't like thinking about it. About any of it. It used to be so much easier to tell myself that it didn't happen to me. That these memories were just nightmares and they weren't real. It's gotten harder to convince myself that it didn't really happen. I did so many bad things. So many."

The tears started to pour down Clay's face and Adam had enough. He moved his chair over to Clay and he removed the beer bottle from Clay's hand, placing it down on the ground. He then wrapped his arms around Clay and pulled him into him. Clay didn't fight the comfort, he simply placed his head down on Adam's shoulder and allowed the tears that he had kept inside of him for so long to finally come out. Adam didn't say anything, there really wasn't anything he could say that would make this better at all. All he could do was hold his son and be there for when he needed help or support. After a few moments Clay pulled back and Adam wiped at his cheeks before Clay could.

"I know you probably don't want to talk about it right now, and that's ok. But if you ever want to talk about some of those things you were forced to do or was forced onto you, I will always be there to listen. Always." Adam said.

"I just want to forget. And I did for years, I don't know why it's bothering me this past year." Clay said, completely confused.

"I'm not an expert, but I do know that child soldiers can be similar to child abuse victims. Sometimes it doesn't bother them until they are older when it fully hits them what they have done or been through. I know you might not be ready to talk about it right now, but eventually you really need to talk to someone, a professional even. You can't carry it around forever, it will destroy you."

"I know and I had to see a Shrink when I first started in boot camp. My physical revealed injuries that lead to questions. The military knows I was a child soldier and they have it sealed, but I had to be cleared by a shrink before I could graduate boot camp."

"Ok, what did the Shrink say?" Adam had to admit he was surprised that the military knew about Clay being a child soldier and was still allowing him to operate in the field. He should never have been allowed to be in the military, but especially in a field position.

"That the first step is accepting that I need to forgive myself. That the things I was forced to do, I did them because I had no choice and not because I wanted to. Said I probably had some version of PTSD, but it wouldn't affect my working for the military. I don't have the type of PTSD that can be triggered or cause me to have an episode. It's something that will give me nightmares and have problems outside of the military, but nothing that would prevent me from operating. Military sealed it all away and only those that need to know, know."

Adam gave a nod, but he didn't like it. He didn't like that Clay was still haunted by his time in Africa. He didn't like that he seemed to have been tortured at some point. He hated that Clay had been molested for eight years. Just like he would have been forced to be there for when other people were raped, killed and tortured. All of that was before he even thought about his son, at the young age of seven or eight would have killed for the first time. It was all one nightmare, one that he knew he would be experiencing in his own dreams for a long time to come.

"Can I ask how you got out?" Adam asked. He really didn't like lying to Clay and not telling him about how he heard from Jason about his back, it was lying to Adam.

"I was ah fourteen and the leader was pissed off with this one small village. He didn't like that they were going against him by using the aid camp nearby for food. He wanted to teach them a lesson, so he had all of us round up everyone in the village and while we were doing that, he grabbed a seven year old girl, stripped her naked and tied her wrists to a post right in the middle of everyone. He told me to rape her, it was the first time anyone had ever demanded for me to do that. I told him no, and he told me that if I didn't, he was going to tie me up and whip me to death to teach everyone a lesson. I went over and cut her loose. I was prepared to die that day, and I almost did. Sixty-four lashes to my back before a Seal team had gotten word that something was going down in the village. I heard a voice tell me it would be ok. A really gentle set of hands held onto me as I was cut down and looked over. I remember it was the first time since I was four that I had felt safe. Since I wasn't scared. I thought I was gonna die, but it helped knowing that someone seemed to care enough to make sure I wasn't alone and made me feel safe. It was Jason."

"Jason was the one that held you." Adam stated. He made a mental note to speak to Jason tomorrow and thank him.

"Ya. He doesn't know it was me. I only know it was him because I heard the other guy call him Jason and I saw his name tag. He has no idea it was me. He's why I decided to be in the Navy, to be a Seal one day. I wanted to do what he did for me to other children. Once I was healed up enough I got onto the aid plane and was dropped in New York City. I spent the next four years living on the street and going to high school."

Adam shook his head. None of that should have happened to Clay. None of it needed to happen, all of it could have been avoided if Ash hadn't sent him away.

"How often did you see Ash once you got back?"

"It varied. Not until I was in boot camp did he reach out. Growing up I never blamed him. I had convinced myself that my memories from growing up weren't real. That I had invented them to make myself feel better. I told myself that Ash sent me to live with his parents because he thought it would be the best thing for me. That it wasn't his fault that he didn't know I was in trouble or homeless in New York. When he reached out I was excited to see him. I thought maybe now that I was an adult we could finally have a relationship."

"Did you?"

"At first I thought we were building something. He didn't come around much, but he would call at times. Whenever he did come around it was to bring me to some diner that he had going on with someone else. I figured out about a couple years later he was using me as a way to impress people. His son following in his footsteps, it was a good way to pad his reputation. But whenever I needed to talk or him there for me, he was never around. He shows up a couple of times a year to make it seem like he's interested and cares now. He called me earlier before I came here, I didn't answer. He's probably back in town."

"I know you grew up with him as your dad." Adam started, but Clay cut him off.

"Except I didn't. Even in Africa, I never thought of him as dad, it's always been Ash. The man I remembered was my dad, you were my dad. Now that I know for sure that those memories were real and that he had other options. I don't want anything to do with him. I thought it wasn't his fault what happened to me, but now I know it was. He trapped me in hell when he could have let me grow up with loving parents and free from the pain and trauma I went through. I don't want him around me. I don't want to talk to him, ever again." Clay said with strength and anger to his voice.

"And you don't have to. If you want I can reach out to him and tell him to not contact you again."

Adam was more than happy to ensure that Ash stayed the hell away from his son. He didn't deserve the right to call Clay his child.

"No it's fine. He goes away eventually on his own."

"Ok, but the offer still stands."

Clay gave a nod and he wiped at his cheeks again. "Sorry I'm such a mess."

"You aren't a mess. You are someone that has been through a lot in your life and you've had to go through it all on your own. I don't expect you to be perfect and ok all the time. I want you to be yourself and one day I would love for you to be happily married and have a child of your own. As a father, all I want is for you to be happy. It's ok to not be ok Clay, it's ok to need to work things out. And people, men, that think otherwise are the ones that never make it out of this life alive. They are the ones that end up with nothing, but drinking or drug problems wishing their life had gone differently. Don't ever keep your feelings bottled up, that's how you become one of those men and you are better than that."

"Thank-you for everything you did for me growing up, for still being here now."

Adam pulled Clay in for a hug as he spoke. "I'm always going to be there for you. I love you son."

"I love you too dad." Clay whispered back and it flooded Adam's heart with warmth at hearing Clay call him dad again.

Adam didn't know what the future would hold for them, but he knew one thing, he had his son back in his life and he was not going to let Ash ever come between them again. Clay closed his eyes and allowed himself to feel the love that Adam felt for him. It had been almost twenty years, but he was finally home where he belonged.


End file.
